The legendary Loch Ness Monster was caught on tape by an amateur scientist in Scotland over the weekend.
I’m no expert, but I know a think or two about the high price of fame. One time I was being chased by a band of paparazzi and had to jump into a nearby river for cover. I held my breath for 14 minutes as I swam to freedom. Of course, once I got to shore there was just another group of nasty photographers waiting for me. And they’re all like, “There he is! There’s the monster!” The monster of love.
Besides, I wouldn’t want to be caught on tape either if I was that fat. I didn’t even know they had lenses that big. It’s like he ate a whale, only at the time the whale was riding Rosie O’Donnell.