Tuesday, June 3, 2008

One Of These Stories Is More Important Than The Other

HOW TO ACHIEVE IMMORTALITY*

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SIPPY CUPGATE

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* For the record, if I uncovered the secret to cheating death, I would make it the only story on the entire page. And there would be a huge graphic of the grim reaper doubled over in pain with a sword made of hearts sticking out of his chest and the headline “DEATH DIES LONELY AND A VIRGIN.” Because fuck him.

4 Comments:

Anonymous BurkeInTheOzarks said...

To all you artsy types - we need a graphic made, STAT!

June 3, 2008 at 5:08:00 PM EDT  
Blogger A Lil' Irish Lass said...

So it's totally the Suri story, right?

June 3, 2008 at 5:23:00 PM EDT  
Anonymous JustinS said...

I'd need a bottle if I were the Spawn of Cruise, too. I'm sure that thing's filled with Hennessy.

June 3, 2008 at 6:03:00 PM EDT  
Blogger Bill From Gainesville said...

FUCK DEATH INDEED... Bravo!

June 3, 2008 at 6:20:00 PM EDT  

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