Thursday, August 20, 2009

Breaking News: Yahoo! Commenter Improbably Solves Complex Gender Issue

BERLIN (AP) -- Facing questions about her gender, South African teenager Caster Semenya easily won the 800-meter gold medal Wednesday at the world championships.

Her dominating run came on the same day track and field's ruling body said she was undergoing a gender test because of concerns she does not meet requirements to compete as a woman.

The process requires a physical medical evaluation and includes reports from a gynecologist, endocrinologist, psychologist, internal medicine specialist and gender expert.


(Scene: Sports Testing Laboratory in Berlin. Everyone has German accents. Stefan is reading Yahoo!)

Stefan: "Hans, have you seen this?"
Hans: "No, what?"

(Hans leans in over Stefan's shoulder and reads.)

Stefan: "Has anyone tried this?"


Hans: "I feel very stupid for not thinking of this."
Stefan: "It is not your fault, Hans. We are scientists! We are trained to question."
Hans: "But the solution was right there before our eyes!"


Stefan: "Would you prefer to lift her tail or do the looking?"
Hans: "We will flip a coin."
Stefan: "Okay. What is heads and what is tails?"

(They both break out into hysterical laughter.)

Hans: "I am German and that is even funny to me!"


Anonymous Anonymous said...

It really is that simple-I don't understand why they are bringing all this nonsense in it.

August 20, 2009 at 5:42:00 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't know the situation, but it's not that easy. I know it's a humour blog, but hermaphrodites (now called intersexuals) do exist and always have existed.

August 21, 2009 at 1:20:00 AM EDT  
Blogger Mad Phoenix said...

OK. I don't get the psychological evaluation, but everything else points to they think she WAS a he. Meaning sex change, not hermaphroditism. Either way, FUCK YOU AUSTRALIA!!! Don't hate cos we beat your asses to the finish line. Suck it up and "be a man" about it. Yes, I am South African and Semenya is THE MAN!!!! now go and prove it

August 21, 2009 at 8:35:00 AM EDT  
Blogger Scott Jones School of Dance said...

WTF is a gender expert?

She could changer her first name to Gina.

August 21, 2009 at 9:29:00 AM EDT  
Blogger LiLu said...

The last line of this made me snarf a little coffee.

Mostly because I thought it before you said it.


August 21, 2009 at 12:04:00 PM EDT  
Blogger Liberal Banana said...

As always: hilarious!

I wondered the same thing about why gender testing would take weeks. Can't just peek down there and see what parts he/she's got? (Well then I guess they'd have license to go up to ANY athlete and say they have to do a gender test. "Excuse me, miss. Please pull down your pants." Okay, so maybe not.)

August 21, 2009 at 12:39:00 PM EDT  
Blogger Faith said...

Are people actually seriously asking "what's so difficult about this?"??? Please tell me you people are kidding as much as Dan it. Please.

August 21, 2009 at 12:45:00 PM EDT  
Blogger Faith said...

Gah! "It" = "is" in my last comment.

August 21, 2009 at 12:47:00 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just read something that says rearrange the letters of her name -- it says "A Secret Man, Yes" - how weird!?!?

August 21, 2009 at 2:28:00 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm surprised that people (some of your commentors) think it's "that" easy.

August 21, 2009 at 4:18:00 PM EDT  

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